Jennifer and Tsering wanted to celebrate their marriage with a small gathering of family, sangha members and friends.  Now that Tsering had been in the US for almost a year, he had forged relationships with Jennifer’s family and friends.  They asked the Rinpoches to offer their blessings at a small ceremony on the land.  The Rinpoches aceepted their request and set a date in mid August.  Jennifer made invitations for the marriage blessing using a painting that Tsering had recently created which depicted two butterflies attracted to a lotus flower, all encircled by a heart-shaped rainbow against the background of snow-covered mountains, green valleys and a blue lake.  Around fifty or so guests were invited and Jennifer made special plans for the day.  She rented a canopy tent to erect in the field where the Rinpoches conducted fire pujas during the summer Dharma festivals.  She also ordered a beautiful wedding cake from the Hudson River Club’s pastry chef.  She bought a wedding gown one day in Brooklyn quite unexpectedly while walking down Seventh Avenue.  She had never imagined herself getting married before, let alone buying a traditional white wedding gown.  However, when she saw the white laced strapless bodice with a multi-layered full-length tulle skirt decorated with three dimensional cream flowers in between its layers, she spontaneously decided to try it on.  It fit perfectly and seemed it was made just for her.  It came with a lovely lace shawl to wrap around her shoulders and was priced very reasonably for just one hundred and eighty dollars.  She decided to buy it and asked the saleslady to keep it there at the shop for her until the date of the ceremony drew closer.  She wanted to observe the tradition of not letting the groom see the dress before the wedding– even though they were already officially married.

The day before the ceremony, Jennifer and Tsering picked up the cake, the dress and two of Tsering’s Tibetan friends who also lived in Brooklyn and drove up to Padma Samye Ling.  They stopped at the supermarket in town and bought all the food they planned to serve the Rinpoches and the guests at a picnic on the porch of the sangha house.  Once they arrived at the retreat center they immediately got to work making five hundred momos.  Jennifer had asked a dear old friend from her Brown Ledge Camp days to be her maid of honor.  Sue Ellen arrived in the evening so that they could spend time together, just girls, before the big day.  Jennifer was very busy the entire day with preparations and she was glad when Sue Ellen arrived to pull her away from the work to visit and get some beauty rest.  They left Tsering and his friends to finish up the momo making.

The next day, Jennifer’s family drove up to the land early in the morning to help with last minute details.  It was their first time to the retreat center and first encounter with the Rinpoches.  Jennifer’s mother was the only family member at the wedding who had met the Lamas before.  When Lama Chimed passed, Maureen happened to be staying at the apartment in Florida.  Jennifer had asked her to stop by the Dharma Center in Lake Worth for the Memorial Service to pay respect on her behalf.  Jennifer’s father and stepmother had many encounters with the Lamas– it was through them that Jennifer had met the precious Dharma and the Rinpoches in the first place.  However, due to personal obstacles they were unable to be present at the ceremony that day.  It saddened Jennifer that they could not be there, but there was nothing she could do to change the situation and had to accept it as it was.

Jennifer’s sister and mother helped her to get dressed and ready while the rest of the men helped carry and set up chairs under the canopy in the field.  The sangha members helped set up a shrine for the ceremony as well as the seats and ritual items for the Rinpoches.  In the early afternoon, the rest of the guests arrived– extended family and friends from Jennifer’s college years.  Once everyone was assembled under the tent, the Rinpoches arrived to officiate the ceremony.  Jennifer was escorted by her mother Maureen through the tall summer grass of the field as crickets jumped in between the tulle of her gown.  Jennifer carried a lovely bouquet of perennial flowers assembled for the occasion by her friend Pam who owned a perennial farm down the road.

Tsering was standing under the tent with the rest of the attendees, dressed in a sky blue Tibetan silk shirt and white pants.  His eyes were wide with amazement and joy to behold his bride in her full glory.  Even though the young couple had been married for over a year at this point in time, they felt every bit the nervousness and anticipation of a couple about to wed.  In the presence of the Buddha, Guru Rinpoche and Tara on the shrine, the Rinpoches, sangha, family and friends bearing witness, Jennifer and Tsering’s hearts overflowed with love and support.  The summer breeze blew softly through the canopy as the Rinpoches welcomed everyone to the ceremony.  The Lamas gave a short talk about the commitment of marriage from a Buddhist perspective, explaining how patience was a vital ingredient to a successful relationship.  They rejoiced in the fact that two individuals from such different backgrounds had found common ground, proof of the power of bodhicitta– compassionate mind– to overcome barriers such as language and cultural differences.  The Rinpoches then began the Buddhist blessing ceremony in which they prayed to the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas for the long life, prosperity and happiness of the couple.  They chanted auspicious prayers and mantras that were carried on the soft breeze and into the stainless blue sky.  While the prayers continued, the younger of the Khenpo Brothers wrapped khatags, white ceremonial scarves, around each of their necks and then tied a knot between them, symbolically joining the couple in eternity.  Once the prayers were complete, the Rinpoches asked everyone in attendance to throw rose petals on the crown of the couple’s heads as a symbol of good wishes and blessing.  The first person to approach the young couple was Jennifer’s grandfather who took great enjoyment out of launching a fistful of flower petals on his grand-daughter’s head of red curls.  The rest of the guests took equal pleasure in his participation and they all broke out in laughter.  Tibetan and Buddhist friends in attendance then offered khatags to the couple.  By the time the flower petal and khatag processions were over, Jennifer and Tsering were covered in white silk and rose blossoms.  Khenchen Rinpoche then led the assembly in a celebratory Tibetan Buddhist shout-out to the Gods by crying out “Lha Gyalo!”  There was joy, laughter and merriment all around as the guests were then invited to take a tour of the temple while Jennifer and Tsering posed for portraits with the family.  Jennifer’s sister Carol had offered to take the photos that day and was doing a wonderful job of documenting this precious moment in time for the couple.

After the tour of the temple, guests made their way back to the sangha house where refreshments were served and gifts were opened while the momos steamed.  Jennifer’s sisters both helped Tsering’s Tibetan friends in the kitchen while Jennifer and Tsering enjoyed the company of their dear friends and family who had joined them for the day.  Tables and chairs were set out on the porch for the picnic and baskets of perennials served as center pieces.  When the food was ready to be served, the Rinpoches were invited to share in the feast.  The guests all took their seats around the giant length of a table and toasts were made throughout the meal in honor of the Rinpoches for their blessings and the young couple for their commitment.  At the end of the meal the gorgeous wedding cake was brought out.  Jennifer was reluctant to cut into the edible art, but, as is custom, she and Tsering made the first cut together and then served each other their first bites.

The sun started to set past the tree-lined western horizon and the Rinpoches bid their farewells to the assembly.  Jennifer’s family and friends were all so honored to have been invited to this sacred land where they had the opportunity to encounter the Lamas.  Most of them never had such an experience before and were quite moved by it.  Many of them told Jennifer that although this wedding ceremony was the most humble and intimate one they had attended, it was by far the most meaningful and special.  As the night sky grew darker and the first stars in the sky started to twinkle, the guests started to take their leave.  Each one was asked to take a small citronella plant from the picnic table as a souvenir of the day.  The rest of the perennials that were used as offerings to the shrine under the tent and as decorations for the tables were then offered to the garden in front of the Rinpoches’ home.  Ani Loretta suggested that Jennifer and Tsering create a small crescent-shaped flower bed for their planting.

Once all of the guests had said their good-byes, some driving home that night, others spending the night in the comfortable rooms of the Bodhicitta Inn on the retreat center land, Jennifer and Tsering made their way back to the canopy in the field where they slept outside in the fresh night air.  The blissful energy of the ceremony still lingered and they were grateful for all the love and blessings they had received that day.

The next morning, after sharing breakfast in the sangha house, Jennifer’s immediate family members took their leave.  Jennifer and Tsering dropped their Tibetan friends off at the local bus depot and then returned the canopy tent to the rental company.  They then walked over to the Rinpoches’ home and planted the flowers in the garden.  With the wedding festivities behind them, they settled back into their retreat routine with the other resident sangha members.

The long summer days were starting to get shorter with each sunset.  Jennifer’s mind started to turn back to secular matters as she anticipated the need to find work and a earn a living.  Jennifer and Tsering had dreams of opening a Tibetan restaurant and even had a location in mind just off Seventh Avenue in Park Slope, Brooklyn.  But the expense of the lease was just out of their reach and despite her Mother’s willingness to co-sign on the lease with them, they decided to hold the dream a bit a longer until they had firmer financial footing.

Growing tired of waiting tables and knowing that landing a performing gig at this point in her career would probably mean going out on tour for long stretches of time away from Tsering, Jennifer decided to switch careers.  She initiated a job search in the Spring for a French-teaching post in New York City’s private schools.  Her double major in French and Theater was proving to be a useful asset after all.  Although she had a couple of promising interviews, she did not receive any offers.  The teaching placement agency she was working with suggested she expand her search beyond New York City to the Upstate area.  She agreed, knowing that the standard of living was cheaper and better the further North one went from the City and also because she wanted to be closer to Padme Samye Ling.  Late in August, Jennifer received a call from the placement agency, notifying her that a French-teaching position had opened at a small private school in Albany, NY.  They had reviewed her resume and requested an interview with her.

Jennifer seized the opportunity and drove two hours East of Padme Samye Ling to Albany, NY.  She pulled her little green VW into a beautiful campus that belonged to the Convent of the Sacred Heart.  Doane Stuart School rented half of the buildings from the Catholic Sisters.  The interview went very well and Jennifer was quickly offered a full time position teaching the Lower and Middle School French classes.  Due to the late timing of the job offer– the school year was to begin in just weeks– the Headmaster asked that she accept the position on the spot.  Jennifer asked to have a couple of hours to make her decision.  She wanted to discuss with Tsering and get her Mother’s advice.  The Assistant Headmaster offered to take her on a tour of the campus in an effort to sway her decision.  The architecture and history of the buildings was impressive.  It wasn’t until she was brought down to the basement of the school, however, that the decision became quite clear to her.  While passing through the student locker area, the Assistant Headmaster stopped briefly to show Jennifer a small space that the school rented out to a local Buddhist group.  Jennifer’s interest was immediately sparked as she peered through the glass doorway and saw a traditionally decorated Tibetan Buddhist shrine room.  At the end of the room was an altar with a framed photograph of His Holiness the 17th Karmapa.  Jennifer smiled from ear to ear and knew her decision had just been made for her.  She took the job on the spot and agreed to return in two weeks time for Orientation.

Jennifer drove back to the retreat center to share the good news with Tsering.  They would have just two weeks to find an apartment in Albany and move their things up from Brooklyn.  The lease on their studio wasn’t over until October so they agreed to continue subletting to the coworker who had used it for the summer season.  Jennifer took another day trip to Albany to find an apartment.  She found a shoebox of an apartment on the second story of a teeny little house in Albany for only three hundred fifty dollars a month.  It offered very modest accommodations but was the only thing she could find in their budget that was available.  Doane Stuart School had offered her a contract that paid only eighteen thousand dollars for the entire school year so they would not have any money to spare.  Jennifer rented a UHaul van and they drove to Brooklyn to pack up their things.  With their small collection of hand-me-down furniture loaded in the back, they drove up Interstate 87 to the Capital City of New York and moved into their new home at 200 Morton Avenue.

Jennifer jumped right into her teaching duties at the school.  She and Tsering were given a warm welcome by the school community and especially the local Karma Kagyu Buddhist group that rented the room in the basement of the school for use as a shrine room.  The sangha members were very hospitable, inviting them to their meditation and prayer sessions.  They also introduced Tsering and Jennifer to two other Tibetans living in Albany with whom they instantly became friends.  Tsering found work with a local contractor pouring foundations.  It was hard, manual labor  but he enjoyed getting out and earning a living.  He would come home at the end of the day covered in cement dust and worn out muscles.

One day while Jennifer was teaching a French lesson to a group of first grade students, the Assistant Headmaster came in, asking Jennifer to step outside to have a word with her.  She had some shocking news to share with her.  “I am sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but we just learned that there has been an awful tragedy in New York City.  A plane has flown into one of the Twin Towers.  I am making the rounds, sharing the news with the faculty so you can contact family members who might be involved.  Parents are calling in for their children and most are going home early.  Do you need me to watch your class so you can make a phone call?  I know you have family who lives Downstate.”

Jennifer was stunned by the news but not quite grasping the gravity of the situation.  “Yes, I think I should call my father.  My uncle owns a restaurant in the World Financial Center and my cousin works there, too.  I should call to see that they’re okay,” she replied.  Jennifer left her class and went to the office to call her father.  He told her that he had tried contacting her uncle at the restaurant but that all the lines were busy.  He was not able to get through.  He told her to say some prayers and hope for the best.  She returned to her class so that the Assistant Headmaster could continue making rounds and soon enough most of the students were picked up early by worried parents who had heard on the news that the incident was a terrorist attack.

Jennifer returned home at the end of the day and turned on the news.  Every channel was reporting live coverage of the tragic events unfolding in Lower Manhattan.  A second plane had struck the second tower and evacuations were underway.  Jennifer couldn’t help but think about how just months ago she and Tsering were working there.  Had they not decided to move Upstate, they could have been at work this very moment, stuck in the crosshairs of this apocalyptic tragedy.  She spent the rest of the day following the events as they unfolded, calling her mother and father to get news updates about family members who lived and worked in the City.  When Tsering returned home from his construction job that day, Jennifer caught him up with the news and they spent the rest of the day in disbelief as they watched live footage of the Towers as they came crumbling down.  One of the Towers fell directly onto the Winter Garden, the building that housed her Uncle’s restaurant.  She and Tsering recited mantras under their breath as they watched the horrific events on the television screen.

The next day at school, the Headmaster led the school community through a prayer service and day of remembrance for all the lives lost the previous day,  September 11th.  Many of the students and adults were worried and fearful about the future.  They worried about further attacks and the safety of the once invincible United States.  The school conducted bomb drills for the next several days in preparation for the unknown.  Jennifer realized it was important to prepare the children and staff for the worst case scenario, but she couldn’t help but wonder if the country had gone into an emotional state of panic.  Considering the circumstances, it was only natural.  She tried to calm the worried questions her students asked her in class– “Will they fly an airplane into my parent’s office building?  What about our school?  Our bell tower is pretty high– maybe a terrorist could attack our school, too.”  Jennifer had compassion for their innocent fears and reassured them that they were quite safe in Albany.

The school community settled back into its normal routine over the course of the next few weeks.  Jennifer started to come home more and more fatigued at the end of the school day.  She put a lot of time and energy into planning and conducting her multiple lessons every day and just assumed that the first year of teaching was taking a toll on her physically.  During a weekend visit with an old friend in Vermont, Jennifer fell ill.  Out of the blue, she felt weak, dizzy and nauseous.  Her friend Annette asked her if she could possibly be pregnant.  No one else in the house was suffering similar symptoms and it wasn’t yet flu season.  Jennifer replied that although it was a possibility, it was unlikely.  She and Tsering had not been actively planning or preparing for children, yet.  Annette suggested that they take a ride into town to get a pregnancy test, just to be sure.  They left the men who were chopping wood in the yard and drove into town to get a test at the supermarket pharmacy.  When they got back, they knew the results within minutes.  Jennifer was expecting.

Annette couldn’t contain her excitement for her friend and gave her a huge congratulatory hug.  “I know this is a total surprise to you, but it’s so wonderful!  You and Tsering are going to make such awesome parents!  Oh my God, you have to go tell Tsering!”  Jennifer was a bit stunned by this development.  She felt a surge of adrenaline rush through her body as the surreal situation of moments ago became tangibly real with the test’s result.  She left the house to go share the news with Tsering.

“Tsering-la,” she said as she approached him, “I think you should sit down.  Here, on this log.  I have some very important news to share with you.  The reason that I am sick is because I’m pregnant.  We’re going to have a baby!”  Tsering stared back at Jennifer in shocked disbelief.  She continued, “I know this is a complete surprise and we had no plans for a child, yet, but this is it!  A baby is coming!”  As Jennifer said these words, she felt her own initial shock turn into acceptance and excitement.  Tsering would need a little more time to process the information before he would be able to share in her joy.  The whole situation was making his head swirl.  As an ex-monk, Tsering had very little experience with the concept of pregnancy, let alone the scientific wonder of the instant result pregnancy test.  The events of the day were going a bit too fast for him.  Thankfully, Annette and her boyfriend Etienne were really great support to both Jennifer and Tsering that day.  They took both of them inside, and had some great heart-to-heart talks about their future and a little baby’s place in it.  By the end of their visit, Tsering started to get over his initial shock and warm up to the idea of walking the sacred path of parenting together with his partner Jennifer.

The parents-to-be did not share their news with anyone until Jennifer was into her second trimester of pregnancy.  Once this critical period was over, they shared their excitement with family, friends and colleagues.  The baby was due in early June, during the holy month of Saga Dawa.  Jennifer would be able to finish out her teaching year with no interruption.  One of their Tibetan friends who lived in Albany offered to help Tsering secure a job at the Albany Medical Center in the Receiving and Distribution department.  Sonam worked as a nurse at the hospital and knew the manager of the R&D department.  Just after the changing of the year, Tsering was offered a full-time position with benefits and vacation time.  He started work the following week.  Now that they both had full-time work with steady income, Jennifer started thinking about buying a home for their new family.  They applied for a mortgage and were pre-approved for a modest amount that would allow them to buy a house.

They spent the next few months looking at homes in the downtown neighborhoods of Albany.  Eventually they found a cozy townhouse with a lovely garden, patio and fountain in the backyard, offstreet parking and a workshop in the basement.  The first floor was a three-bedroom owner’s unit and the two-bedroom apartment upstairs was currently rented.  The rental income from the upstairs unit would help them with their monthly mortgage payments.  It was the perfect fit for their needs.  Their real estate agent suggested they look into a program for low-income first-time home owners offered through the City of Albany.  Designed to encourage people to stay within the city limits, the program offered grants to qualifying home-owners to use as down payments and rehab of the property.  Jennifer and Tsering were well within the program’s income limits and seized the opportunity.  The paperwork was going to slow down their home purchase considerably but was well worth the wait.  The housing agency agreed to give them fifteen thousand dollars towards their down payment and another sixteen thousand to use for lead abatement and rehab of the property.  Jennifer and Tsering’s offer was accepted on the house and they initiated all the necessary paperwork to get funding.  Jennifer was anxious to get into the home before the baby arrived but it became clear that it just wasn’t going to be possible.

One month before the baby was due, Jennifer was showered with gifts from family and friends.  Her sister and mother organized an intimate party for relatives and old friends, and then her colleagues at school threw a second shower for her at work.  By the time all of the gifts were brought into their tiny apartment, they barely had room to move amongst all the baby paraphernalia that had been gifted to them– they were swimming in an ocean of baby clothes, furniture, diapers, and toys.  Jennifer loved looking at all the baby outfits and spent many hours imagining who the little person that soon would be wearing them might be.  Tsering was intrigued by all the gadgets and gizmos associated with babies here in America.  Back home in Tibet he had never seen such things as diaper bins, baby wipes or even diapers for that matter.  Jennifer made sure that she and Tsering attended birthing classes as she was planning to give birth naturally.  Together they learned about the different techniques used during labor to help the mother through contractions and pain.  While other women in the class were open to the idea of natural birth, none of them were as committed to the idea as Jennifer.  She was absolutely confident in her ability to give birth the old fashioned way.  She wrote up a birth plan outlining her commitment to natural birth and asked her sisters and Tsering to support her in this plan.

The baby’s due date came and went as the final days of school were winding down.  While sleeping one night, Jennifer was awoken in the early hours of the morning with her first contractions.  Tsering excitedly packed a bag and brought her to the hospital.  She was admitted to a room and checked for timing of contractions.  After a few hours of no progression the nurses checked her out and told her to go take a really long walk, all day if necessary.  Disappointed that it was just a false alarm, Jennifer and Tsering drove back home and called her sisters.  They were both waiting at her mother’s home in Gloucester for the big moment to finally arrive.  They decided to make the drive over to Albany to help Jennifer walk herself into labor.  They arrived a few hours later and together with Jennifer and Tsering they walked all over the neighborhoods of Albany– through Lincoln Park, past the Governor’s mansion, into the Cathedral on Eagle Street, down Madison Avenue for a bite to eat at Van’s Vietnamese Restaurant and then over to the Capital Building and City Hall.  Jennifer’s swollen, pregnant feet were starting to ache from all the walking but her contractions were still too far apart.  Her sisters were very excited about the imminent arrival of the baby so they kept her walking.  They gave her a short break during a car-ride to the mall but once inside, they had her walk the length of both floors.  Finally the contractions started to intensify.

They drove back home thinking that it would be time to check back into the hospital but the contractions dropped off again.  Tsering offered to make momos for everyone while they waited.  A thunderstorm blew through town and the electricity went out for an hour or so.  They ate momos by candlelight while thunder and lightning crashed.  After dinner, the storm subsided and everyone grew tired of waiting and went to bed.  Just moments after lying down, Jennifer’s body entered its true labor.  Tsering brought her to the hospital and let her sisters make their way up separately.  Jennifer was re-admitted to a labor and delivery room and was assigned a wonderful nurse who was equally excited as Jennifer about her natural birth plan.  “We don’t get too many folks like you here.  I don’t think I’ve been assigned a natural birth my entire thirteen years of working at this hospital!  I’m really excited to do this with you.  It’s an honor,” the nurse said with confidence and sincerity.  Jennifer was grateful this particular nurse was on the night shift.  She was really going into this whole thing blind and was so thankful to have someone with more experience on her team.

Jennifer’s hard labor lasted about eight long hours.  Tsering, Carol and Anne all took turns comforting and supporting her through the intensity of the pain and contractions.  She suffered from back labor as the baby was in the posterior position.  She wanted to use the birthing tub but the doctors on duty would not allow her access to it.  They insisted that she stay plugged in to all the monitors at all times and the tub risked her not being monitored.  The nurse suggested that she get into the shower and let the hot water ease the constricted muscles in her back.  This helped greatly.  She also used the birthing ball and squatting as ways to move the baby through the birth canal and take the pressure off her back.  Eventually the baby finally started to crown in the early morning hours.  The nurse held a mirror up for Jennifer so she could be encouraged to push.  The nurse went to get a doctor to deliver the baby but they were all tied up with emergency c-sections.  The nurse was extremely calming and reassuring, telling Jennifer over and over again that she could do it.  She coached her through the final pushing phase and just at the last moment a resident came in to catch the baby.  Jennifer heard the doctor say “It’s a girl” and then the baby’s first cries before they whisked her away into a side room to be weighed, cleaned and swaddled.  Jennifer was left alone to be stitched up by the resident while Tsering and her sisters were all in the side room with the baby, cooing and fawning over the precious newborn.  Jennifer was exhausted, lonely and in pain from the episiotomy.  It seemed like an eternity before anyone remembered Jennifer until finally they brought her baby to her.  The nurse presented a wide-eyed tightly swaddled little bundle of life to Jennifer who fell in love at first sight.  Suddenly all of the pain and fatigue vanished as she took her baby girl into her arms.  The nurse coached her on now to hold the baby and get her to latch and suckle.

Jennifer was not prepared to name the baby.  She and Tsering had several boy’s names picked out, anticipating that the baby would be a boy.  They were caught off guard when the doctor told them she was a girl.  After giving it some thought, Jennifer was inspired to name the baby after her mother and Tsering’s mother, as a tribute to the matriarchs of their respective families.  And so Baby Maureen Yangchen was named.  Jennifer’s mother arrived shortly after the baby’s arrival and was thrilled to greet her first grand-daughter.  She was very touched that her daughter had named the baby in her honor.  Any fears or doubts that Maureen had harbored about Jennifer’s marriage to Tsering were washed away with the arrival of this her first grand-daughter.  Just like the birth of Sal, Jennifer’s nephew, the arrival of their baby had miraculous healing effects upon the family dynamics.

Jennifer stayed in the hospital overnight so the staff could observe her recovery and the baby’s first days.  Once it was determined that both mother and baby were healthy and stable they were discharged.  Jennifer’s mother and sisters stayed in Albany for the next few days, helping the new parents adjust to life with a newborn.  They spent most of their time cooking, cleaning and shopping so the parents and baby could spend these precious first days bonding, sleeping and recovering from the exhausting labor.  Once they settled into a comfortable routine, Jennifer’s mother and sisters left to return to their own families and homes.  For the next couple of weeks various friends stopped by to meet the new baby and provide delicious meals to the new family.  Tsering and Jennifer were in awe of the miracle of new life and their precious baby girl.  Tsering’s respect for Jennifer had multiplied exponentially while bearing witness to her giving birth.  The birthing process bound their souls even tighter than before as the love they shared between them grew with the addition of the baby to their family.  It was a time of abundance.

This bronze singing bowl is hand-beaten.  It has high sides and produces a beautiful singing tone when struck with the included padded wooden sticker.  Measures approximately 6 inches wide.

This pendant depicts the Tibetan Eternal Knot, one of the 8 Auspicious Symbols.  It is hand-crafted from sterling silver and inlaid with your choice of blue lapis, turquoise or red coral.  It measures approximately 1 inch.  Made in Nepal.

These earrings are made of sterling silver.  They are etched with beautiful celtic designs in a mandala formation.  Available in two sizes.  Large measures approximately 1.5 inches in diameter, Small measures .75 inch in diameter.  Made in Nepal.

This butterlamp is made of bronze and measures approximately 3.5 inches tall.  Tibetan butterlamps are used as offerings of light to be placed on a shrine.  Tibetans traditionally burn butter in them, but vegetable oil may be used as well.  A wick can be made out of cotton wound around a toothpick that is placed in the hole in the center of the cup.  A votive candle may also be placed in the cup in lieu of butter or oil for a cleaner burn.  Made in Nepal.

This butterlamp is made of bronze and measures approximately 4 inches tall.  Tibetan butterlamps are used as offerings of light to be placed on a shrine.  Tibetans traditionally burn butter in them, but vegetable oil may be used as well.  A wick can be made out of cotton wound around a toothpick that is placed in the hole in the center of the cup.  A votive candle may also be placed in the cup in lieu of butter or oil for a cleaner burn.  Made in Nepal.

“Urgyen Rinpoche!” Tsering exclaimed quietly under his breath a quick and urgent prayer to Guru Rinpoche that Tibetans often say in times of worry, surprise, distress, or fear.  Tsering and Jennifer gathered up their things and carried their luggage down the three flights of stairs into the dark alley where the driver was waiting for them.  They put their luggage in the trunk and got into the cab.  While pulling out of the alley, Jennifer checked her backpack one last time to make sure she had all the essentials– passports, airplane tickets, and the last of their cash– just over a thousand rupees.  It was all there.  They had everything needed to ensure a smooth passage from India to America.

Tsering had suggested they buy a Tibetan-style thermos to bring on their trip.  He filled it with Boja, hot Tibetan butter tea, just before the taxi arrived and had a bag full of balep, Tibetan pan-fried bread, and chura, dried Tibetan cheese,  for snacking.  Jennifer had tried to persuade Tsering not to bring the thermos and food along on the trip.  She thought it would just inconvenience them.  Tsering, however  could not imagine making such a long journey without carrying provisions and insisted.

Once they arrived at the airport, they went to check-in.  It turned out their large army-sized duffel bag that was full of merchandise was overweight.  With some clever repacking and shuffling of items into other bags, they had just enough rupees left over after paying the cab to cover the cost of freight.  With no cash left in their pockets, Jennifer was suddenly grateful for Tsering’s thermos full of Boja and bag full of balep.  Her stomach was grumbling after the long cab ride and drama with the luggage.  With boarding passes in hand, it was time to pass through security.  Jennifer breezed right through but Tsering was held for questioning.  The Indian security guard had doubts about the validity of his travel documents.  His passport was not a standard but a specially-issued one for Tibetan Refugees.  This particular policeman had apparently never come across one before.  Jennifer tried to explain Tsering’s situation to the officer but he was convinced that Tsering’s passport was a fake.  He called over a superior who luckily had experience with Tibetan Refugee travel documents.  Tsering was eventually allowed to pass through to the boarding area.  Jennifer led the way to their gate where they sat down to drink tea and eat balep.  Soon enough, their flight was called and they boarded their plane, thermos and all.

Now that they were safe and sound on their first flight, Jennifer let out a deep sigh of relief and rested her head on Tsering’s shoulder.  The adrenaline from the anticipation of the journey was wearing off and fatigue from staying awake all night was hitting hard.  The young couple was fast asleep before the plane even took off.  They slept through almost the entire flight, waking just before the plane started its descent into Icheon Airport in Seoul, Korea.  Their lay-over was just a few hours long and once again Jennifer was grateful for the thermos of Boja that was incredibly still warm.  They sat in the gate’s lounge area waiting for their second and final flight to Seattle, sipping Boja and getting giddy about Tsering’s imminent arrival in the States.  There were some other Americans also waiting to board their flight and Jennifer joined them in conversation.  She hadn’t spoken with any Americans other than the Consulars at the Embassy since she had arrived back in India over a month earlier.  She introduced Tsering to them and shared how he was about to immigrate to the US.  Everyone was very excited for him, wishing Tsering good luck on his maiden voyage to America.  In the midst of their celebratory chatter, they heard their flight being called for final boarding.  Somehow they had all missed the initial boarding calls.  In a rush, they gathered their things and headed to the gate with their boarding passes.

Jennifer and Tsering boarded the plane and found their seats.  Just as Tsering was putting their bag of provisions in the overhead compartment, Jennifer realized that she did not have her carry-on bag with her.  “My backpack! Tsering do you have my backpack?!”  Tsering looked back at her with a confused expression.  Jennifer had always taken responsibility for her own backpack before and never forgotten it since he’d known her.  This was really out of character for her.  While rushing to the gate moments ago, she must have forgotten it in the terminal where they were conversing with the other Americans.  She jumped up and moved as fast as she could down the aisle back to the door of the plane.  It had already been closed.  She found a flight attendant and pleaded, “Please, you have to let me deboard!  I left my bag in the waiting area!  It has our passports and my husband’s immigration visa in it!  If the bag is where I think I left it, I won’t be but a minute!”

“All right.  We’ll open the door and let you go get it.  I’ll call attendant at the gate and ask them to open the door for you.  But if you’re not back in two minutes, we’re going to have to leave without you.”

“I promise– I’ll be right back.”  Jennifer started to panic as she ran back up the boarding ramp to the terminal.  “What if her bag was gone?  What if someone stole it?  What if their passports and Tsering’s immigration visa were gone?”  Her mind and heart were racing as she approached the door that was being held open by a flight attendant.  She ran past him and headed straight to the window where she had been sitting on a ledge before they realized their flight was in its final boarding phases.  Thankfully, her black leather Coach backpack was still there, right where she had left it.  She undid the brass buckle and lifted the flap to check that their precious contents were still inside.  It all was there.  Jennifer silently thanked the Three Jewels for her good luck.  This could have had a much different outcome.  She quickly ran back to the gate and thanked the attendant for holding the door for her.  She ran down the ramp and back onto the plane, making eye contact with Tsering as she turned down their aisle and giving him a reassuring smile that all was fine.

“Can you imagine, Tsering?” she said, taking her seat and fastening her seatbelt.  “That was so close!  What if I had not realized I’d left the bag back in the terminal until after the plane took off?!  Or what if someone had stolen it?!  We would have lost everything!  I can’t believe I did that.  It’s so unlike me.  I must be really tired or too excited.  I’m sorry.”

“No worry, Jenni.  It was scary, yes.  I see you leave the airplane and I don’t know if you coming back!  I so happy when you come on airplane again and I see you!  I don’t want to go America by myself!” Tsering explained that he had a bit of scare of his own, too.  Jennifer kept the backpack under the seat in front of her where she could see it.  She wasn’t going to take any chances by leaving it in the overhead compartment.  For the length of the flight across the Pacific Ocean, Tsering and Jennifer watched movies and chatted about Tsering’s first meeting with his new American family members.  Jennifer’s sister Anne and her father were planning to meet them at the airport.

When the flight arrived at Seattle-Tacoma International Airport, Tsering and Jennifer passed through immigration and customs.  Jennifer was nervous– she was worried that there might be some kind of obstacle or snafu with Tsering’s immigration visa.  Everything had been such hard work up until now, she was accustomed to challenges presenting themselves along the way.  However, not moments after Tsering presented his yellow Indian International Certificate with his American Immigration visa affixed inside, he was issued a temporary Green Card and Social Security Number.  “Welcome to America,” the Immigration Officer said as he handed Tsering his American documents.  “Your permanent Green Card will be sent in the mail.  But with this temporary one and your social security number, you are legal to reside and work in the United States starting today.  Good luck.”  Tsering and Jennifer were both surprised by the efficiency and ease with which Tsering passed through immigration.  As they crossed past the red line into the baggage claim area it was official.  Tsering was in America!  They found their luggage and passed through Customs.  The oversize army duffel was inspected by a Customs Officer who was curious about all the merchandise inside.  Jennifer explained that they had been living in India the past six months and that Tsering had just immigrated to the US.  She explained that they had a ton of gifts for her family members and souvenirs for Tsering to remember his life back home.  The Officer zipped the bag back up and let them pass.

Jennifer and Tsering gathered their things and passed through sliding doors out into the terminal where family members and friends were anxiously awaiting the arrival of passengers as they exited Customs.  Jennifer scanned the crowd and spotted her sister and father who was holding a helium balloon decorated with the American flag.  She waved to them and caught their attention.  Huge smiles were followed by warm hugs as Anne and Walt showered affection on both Jennifer and Tsering equally.  Tsering had never received a greeting in this fashion before and was a bit overwhelmed by it.  He was going to have to get used to public displays of affection, in particular the American custom of hugging.  However, he could not help but feel the sincere love and warm intent behind these strange gestures and was instantly relieved by their warm welcome.  Jennifer could tell that her father was truly sincere in extending his welcome to Tsering.  He immediately took to him, engaging Tsering in conversation and listening patiently to his nervous responses.  Jennifer was glad they had chosen to come to Seattle.

Back at her sister’s home, the family shared a meal together while everyone gave Tsering their full interest and attention.  They were so curious to get to know their new Tibetan family member.   They wanted to know about his family back home in Tibet, what life was like growing up in the Himalayan mountains, and what his previous life was like as a monk.  Anne’s husband, Brad, a passionate mountain climber, was especially interested in Tsering’s experiences in the mountains as a young yak farmer.  Tsering had plenty to talk about and a lot of English to learn in order to express himself.  He felt comfortable with his new family and appreciated their warm welcome and sincere interest in his very different background and culture.  At the end of the evening, Anne brought them downstairs into the basement of her home where she graciously offered them the use of a small apartment for as long as they needed.  Jennifer and Tsering thanked her and then collapsed on the large queen-sized bed that was covered in fresh linens and soft pillows.  Tsering and Jennifer had never shared such a luxurious bed before.  Back in India they were used to sleeping on simple wooden twin bed frames with thin mattresses.  They slept sweetly and soundly in their new digs despite their jetlag and the nine hour time change.

The next few weeks were spent in relaxed harmony with Anne, Brad and their adorable two year old son, Sal.  Sal was the first and only grandchild in the family at the time.  He had a head of bright read hair, just like his adoring mother and two doting aunties.  Sal was a special child.  He had a difficult passage into this life and the fact that he survived the first week after birth was a miracle.  After months of therapies and testing, the doctors were unable to give a clear diagnosis to baby Sal’s condition, but it was clear he had many challenges ahead of him. Despite the doctors’ vague and pessimistic prognosis, however, little Sal proved them wrong time after time, surpassing benchmarks and expectations for what they thought his little body would be able to do.  Down the road, it was discovered that baby Sal had been born without a fully developed corpus callosum, the part of the brain that connects the right and left hemispheres.  Without this vital part of the brain working correctly, Sal’s body had multiple central line disorders.  As an infant he did not have a natural sucking mechanism so was unable to nurse or drink from a bottle.  He was fed through a feeding tube that passed from his nose, down his throat and into his stomach.  Later on, as a toddler he had a surgery that installed a g-tube directly into his stomach.  Later it became evident that Sal was cognitively delayed as well and was given the autistic label by the specialists.  Despite all the challenges, though, Sal’s arrival in the family had a palpable healing effect on the entire family.  He brought out the best in everyone and increased the family’s capacity for compassion and presence.

Tsering was especially fond of little Sal.  He and Jennifer often babysat him while Anne ran errands or took advantage of their presence in her home to go out on dates with her husband Brad.  They used the baby backpack to take him on walks around the lovely Greenlake neighborhood of Seattle and picked up all sorts of child care skills from their time spent with him.  Since Jennifer and Tsering were both the “Chung-was” or babies of their families, they didn’t have much previous experience with child-rearing.  So in this regard, baby Sal was their first teacher in parenting.

Jennifer and Tsering also had fun in Anne’s kitchen.  Tsering marveled at all the automated machines in Anne’s home– the refrigerator, the oven, the dishwasher, the microwave, the vacuum, the washer and dryer.  He had never seen any of these modern appliances before back home in rural Tibet or as a monk in India and was very impressed with the convenience they offered.  Tsering and Jennifer enjoyed preparing Tibetan meals for the family, introducing them all to the gastronomic delight known as the momo.  With rave reviews of their Tibetan meals, Tsering and Jennifer entertained the idea of opening a Tibetan restaurant.  When they weren’t cooking at home, Jennifer had fun introducing Tsering to the multicultural foods of American restaurants.  The first stop was to Red Mill Burgers– an award-winning gourmet hamburger joint in Seattle.  It was Tsering’s first-ever hamburger experience.  Jennifer ordered him a cheeseburger with grilled onions and mushrooms, french fries and a chocolate milkshake.  Just one bite and he was in love.

On their way back from the Red Mill, Jennifer remembered that there was a small Tibetan gift shop in the same neighborhood and decided to stop by to see if it was open.  They found the storefront and were glad to see that the shop door was open.  The shop was called Pema Karpo and the owner, Rigdzin was there.  He remembered Jennifer from before, she had been in a couple of times during previous visits to her family in Seattle.  Tsering was excited to meet another Tibetan and seized the opportunity to speak his language.  Rigdzin was very hospitable and suggested that he close the shop– it was a slow day he claimed– so he could take them for a visit to the shore together.  He exited through a Tibetan door curtain and went into the back room of the shop where his three year old daughter was watching television.  Moments later he came out with her and asked if Jennifer and Tsering had a car.  They said they did so he suggested they follow him to the the beach.  They spent the rest of the daylight into the early evening playing with little Pema in the sand while Rigdzin and Tsering shared their stories.  Jennifer was very happy that Tsering was able to connect with another Tibetan so soon here in the States.  It turned out that Rigdzin also married an “Inji” or westerner.  His wife was a school teacher and the family was active with the local Sakya Tibetan Buddhist monastery.

Rigdzin suggested they visit the temple with him.  The temple was on their way home to their sister’s house so they agreed.  An evening meditation practice was going on when they arrived and after making three prostrations to the beautiful, large, golden Buddha statue at the center of the shrine, they took seats at the back of the temple and joined in the prayers.   Jennifer had visited a couple of years previously with the Khenpo brothers.  The Rinpoches were visiting Seattle on a teaching tour and stayed at Jennifer’s step-mother and father’s home.  Jennifer flew out to Seattle to be able to spend precious time with the Lamas during their stay.  While visiting the Sakya temple with the Rinpoches, Jennifer learned that the monastery was featured in Bernardo Bertolucci’s film “Little Buddha.”  At the end of the puja, Jennifer and Tsering thanked Rigdzin for a wonderful time together and promised to visit him again at the store.

When Jennifer and Tsering were not spending time with the family, cooking, or babysitting Sal, they stayed in their basement apartment studying, praying and meditating.  Tsering started to work on a tangkha as well.  He wanted to offer a painting of Guru Rinpoche to Jennifer.  He worked on it for several hours everyday.  By the end of their stay in Seattle at the end of one month, the painting was complete.  It was stunning.  Tsering had purchased most of the supplies at a local art supply store in Seattle.  However, he was not satisfied with the selection of paint brushes available for sale.  He said they were not fine enough for the very thin lines that he intended to paint.  He ended up making a paintbrush himself using a few hairs pulled from the tail of Anne’s cat.

Although Jennifer and Tsering spent an idyllic month in Seattle, Jennifer was feeling a pull back to the East Coast.  She missed her Teachers as well as friends and family back in New York.  Tsering was also curious to explore different parts of the country and was especially interested in visiting New York City.  Her sister tried to convince Jennifer and Tsering to stay longer in Seattle and consider settling down there, but the young couple were not ready to make any decisions, yet.  They thanked their sister and brother-in-law for their loving welcome into their home and told them they would be back soon to visit.

Once again Jennifer and Tsering packed up their belongings.  Jennifer’s father and sister dropped them off at the airport the morning of their flight.  They flew to New York City’s La Guardia airport where Jennifer’s grandfather was anxiously waiting to greet his granddaughter and meet her Tibetan husband.  He had graciously offered the young couple the use of his home while they were finding their bearings.  He missed Jennifer while she was away– he had gotten used to her presence the past couple of years she spent living with him.  Despite the fact that he was not completely thrilled to open his house to Jennifer’s husband, a complete stranger to him at this point in time, he was willing to compromise in exchange for some much longed for company.  Jennifer was a little nervous about how the two men were going to get along.  Her grandfather could be unpredictable.  But from the moment Jennifer introduced Tsering to her grandfather outside the terminal on the curb beside her grandpa’s cherry red Caddy, everything went smoothly.  Her grandfather was kind and welcoming to Tsering, and not just in a polite way, but sincerely.  Jennifer remembered that her grandfather identified with Tsering having been an immigrant to the United States himself as a young boy.

They stayed with Jennifer’s grandfather in his Westchester home for two weeks, driving Jennifer’s car or riding the train into the City.  They spent the first few days like tourists– Jennifer brought Tsering to the top of the Empire State Building, to the Metropolitan Museum of Art, the New York Library, and Central Park.  They also visited Jackson Heights, the Indian neighborhood in Queens, where many Tibetans were living to eat at the Indian and Tibetan restaurants.  When they weren’t in the City, they spent time with Jennifer’s grandfather, cooking dinner for him or going for walks by the shore with him.  One day at the shore, Jennifer’s grandfather and Tsering got into an interesting conversation while sitting down on a bench for a short rest.  Jennifer’s grandfather was looking out to the horizon across the water when Tsering said, “You believe the earth is flat or round?”

Jennifer’s grandfather didn’t think he heard the question correctly and responded, “What did you say?  Speak up, I can’t hear you.”

Tsering repeated, “Do you think the earth is flat or round?”

“What kind of crazy question is that?!” the old man replied, frustrated that he had understood the question correctly in the first place and confused by what he viewed as a stupid question.  “Don’t you know that the earth is round?  I thought you were educated!  Jennifer told me you studied for years as a monk.  Didn’t they teach you that the earth is round?  People used to think it was flat, but that was over five hundred years ago.”

Tsering laughed and responded, “Really?  You mean at the end of the ocean the world does not come to an end?  How do you know?”

Jennifer’s Grandfather answered, “I know because there is proof.  Here is a simple way that you can see it with your own eyes.  If you look out to the horizon, you can see a boat very far out to sea.  Right now you can see the entire boat.  But if it keeps going further out, past the horizon, the boat will slowly disappear.  However, you will still be able to see the mast and the sail.  Eventually even the sail will disappear and finally, the mast.”  Jennifer could see that Tsering was not following the nautical terminology and explained to Tsering the meaning of the words mast and sail.

“Oh, now I got you.  Yes, that is a very good proof.  Thank you for showing me.”  Tsering liked the scientific way in which Jennifer’s grandfather explained this concept to him.

“Welcome to the twentieth century, young man!” the old man replied as he gave Tsering an affectionate smack on the back.

Although Jennifer and Tsering enjoyed spending time with her grandpa, they were feeling the urge to find their own place.  They missed the privacy they enjoyed back in India.  Jennifer decided it was time to find a job and start searching for an apartment.  She had several friends living in Brooklyn in the Park Slope neighborhood.  She really liked this neighborhood but unfortunately, the rents were a bit out of their budget.  Jennifer found a job very quickly at a brand-new restaurant in Midtown Manhattan called Tao.  It was opening in just a few days time and she was hired to be a server.  The restaurant was huge with an enormous 3-story statue of the Buddha at the center of the warehouse-sized space.  The menu offered 3 different types of high-end Asian cuisine– Japanese, Chinese and Thai.  Jennifer was hired for her previous waiting experience at both Thai and Japanese restaurants in Vermont.  The job was going to be fast-paced and challenging, but promised a good income in tips.  Jennifer was also planning on getting back into auditions for stage and film.  This restaurant would be a good place for networking.  Once she secured a job, Jennifer’s grandfather generously offered to loan them the money they needed to secure a place.  They were going to need 3 times the amount of one month’s rent as most landlords required first and last month’s rent plus a security deposit in order to secure a lease.  They eventually found a 900 square foot studio apartment in a modest middle class neighborhood called Kensington on Ocean Parkway.  It was just a few blocks from the Southwest entrance to Prospect Park and just one block from the F train.  They would be able to take walks in the park or ride bikes down to the beach and boardwalk at Coney Island.  Their apartment was on the sixth floor, but the building had an elevator.  The studio featured a beautiful parquet floor and lots of light.  Compared to their living conditions in India, this place felt like a palace.

Jennifer and Tsering settled into their first place together Stateside.  Jennifer’s Mom and Stepdad drove down from Gloucester with some furniture for them to use.  Jennifer’s Uncle Bill also donated some furniture that had been sitting unused in the basement of Jennifer’s grandfather’s home.  The night they moved in, Tsering saw an old sofa sitting in the lobby of their building.  It had a sign on that said “free.”  After inspecting it and finding no major flaws, Tsering could not believe that someone would just give away a perfectly good piece of furniture.  He found it very odd indeed.  But he was more than happy to take advantage of someone else’s poor judgement and asked Jennifer to help him haul it up the six flight of stairs.  Jennifer wasn’t as excited about the old sofa as Tsering, but she agreed to adopt it because they needed one.  The fabric was a bit worn in spots, but they could easily throw a large blanket over it to cover it up.

Once all their hand-me-down furnishings were moved in, they had quite a comfortable little home.  Their bed was a futon that Jennifer had inherited from a friend during her college years in Burlington, Vermont.  Their dresser came from her Mother’s childhood room.  Jennifer had enough clothes to fill the top three drawers and Tsering had just enough clothing to his name to fill the bottom drawer.  Their dining table originally came from the kitchen of Jennifer’s childhood home.  Her mother donated them a wicker shelf and a glass coffee table.  Jennifer’s sisters generously offered the young couple a Crate & Barrel gift certificate as a house-warming gift so they could purchase items for their kitchen.

Jennifer started working her new job, commuting into Manhattan mid-afternoon on the subway while Tsering stayed home in the safety of their apartment.  He was not yet confident enough with his English reading skills to venture out into the streets or subway system where he might get lost and not be able to read a map or signs in order to find his way back.  While Jennifer was working at the restaurant, he studied and painted.  One of Anne’s friends back in Seattle had commissioned Tsering to paint a Medicine Buddha tangkha for his shrine room.  Jennifer’s dinner shift did not end until the early hours of the morning.  It turned out Tao was not just a restaurant but a hot new bar/night spot as well.  The opening week was crazy.  The place was packed, with every table on all three floors filled for the entire eight hour shift.  Jennifer’s station was on the top floor, so she had to go up and down two flights of stairs to access the basement kitchen and the bar on the first level.  It was definitely a work-out.  By the end of the night she was exhausted.  She also did not feel comfortable in the nightclub atmosphere, especially with the sacred image of the Buddha and the photos of monks and nuns on the walls.  She felt like her spiritual tradition was being disrespected and commodified.  One of the other waitresses who shared her station was from Mongolia.  Also a Buddhist, she felt ashamed by the disrespectful conduct of the clientele that worsened as the evening wore on.  Post midnight, when the kitchen closed, the restaurant became a night club.  Drinking, drugging and suggestive dancing were in full effect, right in front of the Buddha statue, until closing at 2 AM.

By the time Jennifer had closed out her station, found a cab for the ride back to Brooklyn– not an easy task at 3 AM in Manhattan– and driven back to the apartment, it was nearly 4 AM.  Hoping to roll into a warm bed and welcoming arms, Jennifer was surprised to find the lights on and a distraught Tsering pacing back and forth down the length of their studio.  “Tsering-la, you’re still awake?  It’s so late.  Why aren’t you sleeping?”

“Where have you been?!  Why you coming home so late?! I am waiting you all night!” Tsering was livid.  Jennifer had never seen him like this before.

“I’m sorry I’m so late, Tsering-la.  Please don’t be angry.  I had no idea that my shift would end so late.  The kitchen didn’t close until midnight and then we were expected to continue serving drinks until 2 AM.  By the time the place finally closed and I cleaned my station, it was 3.  I’m exhausted.  You have no idea how many flights of stairs I climbed up and down tonight.  But the good news is I made three hundred dollars in tips.”

“I don’t care how much money you make.  You out in the middle of the night is crazy!  This crazy!  What kind of job is this?!”

“I know.  It is crazy.  I had no idea it was a nightclub, too.  I don’t like it either.  I hate the mindless behavior of the customers in the plain site of the Buddha.  It was disgusting,” Jennifer agreed.  Tsering went to their shrine which sat on top of their dresser and took the small bronze Buddha statue in his hand.  He walked over to Jennifer and placed it on her head.

“Promise you not go back there again, Jenni.  For me.  I your husband and I can’t live like this.  You find better job, in day time.”

“Yes, Tsering, I promise.  I’ll quit.  You’re right, I can find a better job with better hours.  I don’t think I could keep up the stamina required for climbing those stairs, anyway.  But I’ll have to go back in tomorrow to pick-up my paycheck and tell them in person.  But I won’t stay for the shift,  I promise.  Kun Chok Sum,” Jennifer swore by witness of the Three Jewels.

Satisfied with her resolve, Tsering returned the Buddha statue to its central place on the shrine and the two finally went to bed just before dawn.  It was their first quarrel.  Jennifer was relieved that they were able to resolve the situation rather quickly and she was glad that Tsering had pushed her to quit the job.  Due to her work ethic, she probably would have kept working there despite her moral disapproval of the clientele’s conduct.  Jennifer often had a hard time setting boundaries for herself and also had a difficult time saying no out of fear of disappointing others.  But now that she had promised Tsering and sworn by the Three Jewels, she had to quit.

The management and staff were all surprised to hear her resignation, especially after such a financially successful opening.  The VIP Sky Box was reserved for the New York Knicks that evening and P-Diddy was going to be having a private birthday bash later that month.  Everyone wondered why she would walk away from such an opportunity.  But as Jennifer left, she had no regrets.  At the suggestion of her father, Jennifer contacted her Uncle Patrick who owned a five-star restaurant in Lower Manhattan in the Financial District.  He invited her in for an interview the next day.  Her uncle suggested that she bring Tsering with him as well so that he could not only meet him, but so that he could consider him for a job as well.  Patrick owned two restaurants in the World Financial Center complex, both with stunning views of the Hudson River, the Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island.  The restaurant on the upper level was called The Hudson River Club and was well-known for its gourmet cuisine which specialized in local, seasonal offerings of the Hudson River region.  Downstairs was a more casual Irish pub called Moran’s.  Both establishments were popular and busy, catering to the stock brokers and investment firms that worked in the complex.  The older generation frequented the upstairs dining room for business lunches while the younger generation took advantage of the happy hour deals downstairs.

Jennifer’s Uncle kindly offered her and Tsering both jobs.  Jennifer would work a full forty-hour week pieced together with a combination of serving, coat checking and banquets.  Tsering would work part-time as banquet staff.  Jennifer was grateful to her Uncle’s generosity and they started work immediately.  Together they were able to bring in enough money to pay their bills.  Jennifer enjoyed her time in the coat check closet most, where she was removed from the high-stress atmosphere of the dining room.  She brought her laptop to work with her on these days where she could easily multi-task her coat-checking duties with writing and researching a business plan.  She and Tsering were still dreaming of opening a Tibetan restaurant together and had decided to make a go of it in Brooklyn.  Every time an investment banker handed over his overcoat to Jennifer, he would notice her busily typing away on a laptop.  Curious to learn what a coat-check girl could be occupied with, he would inquire about her activity and Jennifer would end up discussing her business plan with him.  She ended up getting not only great business advice from them but often a generous twenty dollar bill in the tip jar as well.

Jennifer and Tsering spent that year commuting into Battery Park to work their shifts.  Every time Jennifer took the subway into the World Trade Center, she had a foreboding feeling in her gut.  She did not like the overwhelming sense of power, wealth, and entitlement that seemed to permeate the very architecture of this epicenter of world finance.  She felt like there was something rotten at the very core of it all.  As she passed through the enclosed overhead crosswalk that joined the Trade Center Towers to the Financial Center buildings, she had an ominous feeling of bad things to come.  She remembered the bombing that had taken place in one of the Towers just a few years back and sensed the negative energy still lingered.  She hoped that she and Tsering would soon find financing to get their new business venture off the ground so that she could stop coming to this corrupt place.

After a few months of work under their belts, Tsering and Jennifer decided to take a vacation.  The Florida Sangha was hosting their annual winter retreat in Palm Beach and the Rinpoches would be offering daily Dharma teachings, meditation and prayer sessions.  Jennifer’s grandfather owned a condo apartment in Palm Beach right on the ocean.  He generously offered the use of his condo to all his family members, especially now that he was not motivated to use it himself in his older years.  Jennifer arranged for her shifts to be covered at the restaurant and they flew down to the land of the Snow Birds to enjoy the precious turning of the Dharma Wheel and the warmth of the Florida sun.

Tsering had not seen the Rinpoches for almost a year.  So much had transpired since his path crossed with Jennifer in Sarnath.  Being in the presence of the Rinpoches and the sacred Dharma was healing and comforting for him.  Yet simultaneously, because he had suppressed so many emotions about being an ex-monk, it brought up discomfort for him as well.  He was going to have to navigate a new spiritual path for himself, one without the red and saffron robes and shaved head of a monk.  He was a layperson now, a householder.  At the same time he was still learning English and the American culture.  He struggled to find himself in this new world.  However, the American sangha members were all very welcoming and supportive to Tsering, curious to learn about him and all he had to offer their community.

In the middle of the week, the Rinpoches invited Tsering and Jennifer to their home in Lake Worth.  They enjoyed tea together in the afternoon and the Lamas enjoyed spending time with Tsering, speaking their shared regional Riwoche dialect of Tibetan and sharing stories about their homeland together.  This reunion was especially healing for Tsering.  After tea, the Rinpoches told Tsering and Jennifer that they could go receive blessings from their father, Lama Chimed Namgyal.  Lama Chimed was in his late eighties and his health had been failing in the past year.  Jennifer was extremely honored for the opportunity to be in his presence.  She was very grateful that Tsering would have the opportunity to meet this great hidden yogi for the first time.

When they entered Lama Chimed’s room, he was sitting on the floor,  as he was apt to do, at the foot of his bed.  He was peacefully abiding in meditation.  The young couple immediately made three prostrations in reverance to this precious teacher and then offered him khatags which he then wrapped around their necks while reciting mantras and prayers to Guru Rinpoche over them as a blessing.  Lama-la then asked them to be seated with him and he engaged Tsering in conversation.  Lama Chimed did not speak English, but he didn’t need to.  His very life and actions went beyond words and were deep teachings in and of themselves.  Lama-la was a Dzogchen master– he had devoted his entire life to contemplation, meditation and prayer.  Just to be in his presence was empowering and purifying.  The entire sangha was extremely devoted to and fond of Lama-la.

Jennifer listened to Lama Chimed and Tsering’s conversation, picking up bits and pieces of their shared Khampa dialect.  Then Lama-la’s attention turned to Jennifer and with a huge smile on his face he said, “Jenni, yakpo re, yakpo re.  Lama America yong gyu pe yakpo re!”  Jennifer didn’t quite understand what Lama was trying to communicate to her other than whatever it was, it was good and pleased him.  She looked to Tsering to translate for her.   He told her that Lama Chimed said he thought it was very good that Jennifer had brought Tsering to America with her.

Lama Chimed laughed and smiled at Jennifer, repeating again in a sing-song kind of way, “Yakpo re, yakpo re, Lama America yong gyu pe yakpo re!”  These words brought so much joy to Jennifer’s heart.  She was still a bit anxious about the choice she and Tsering had made and these affirming words had such a healing effect on her heart.  It was as if Lama knew the inner doubts of this young couple who had taken such a bold leap of faith, crossing cultural taboos on both their parts, to let the truth of their love be known.  On the small puja table that sat in front of Lama was an egg which he picked up and handed to Jennifer with a loving gaze.  Just then, Lama’s eldest son, Khenchen Rinpoche, came into the room to tell his father it was time for the guests to leave so he could rest.  Jennifer and Tsering thanked Lama Chimed for his precious blessings and walked out of the room with their heads bowed in reverence in his direction.  They did not know at the time that would be their final encounter with Lama-la in his current lifetime.

Tsering and Jennifer enjoyed the rest of the week in retreat and the glorious winter weather of the tropics at the beach.  They returned to their studio in Brooklyn at the end of the vacation recharged and renewed.  They returned to their routines of work and study.  Tsering signed up for a free English and citizenship class at the nearby Brooklyn College campus.  They often drove up North to Padma Samye Ling, the Rinpoches’ retreat center in Upstate New York, on the weekends to help with the various painting and building projects that were going on as the interior of the new monastery was being completed.

They celebrated Losar, the Tibetan New Year with the sangha to welcome in the Tibetan Year of the Iron Snake.  Their celebration was sombered shortly after when they heard the news that their beloved Lama Chimed had passed into mahaparinirvana on the 11th day of the 1st month of the New Year.  Lama had shown signs of great accomplishment in his passing– he remained in meditation posture for several days after his transition, his complexion glowed and the lines from his face disappeared.  After 3 days his body was still warm and flexible when it was brought to the crematory.  After the cremation, the Rinpoches found relics in the ashes, further signs that Lama was a realized being who had passed into the Dharmakaya state.  The international sangha spent the 49 days following his passing in traditional ceremonies and prayer in honor of Lama Chimed’s noble life.  Jennifer and Tsering joined the Khenpo Rinpoches in prayer at their home at Padma Samye Ling where they maintained an all-day Vajrasattva prayer vigil while the Rinpoches conducted the Peaceful and Wrathful Buddha Sadhana as well as the Amitabha Sadhana.  Jennifer and Tsering were both honored to be invited to participate in the ceremony with their Teachers in such an intimate way during this potent time.

This bracelet is made with brown glass beads.  It is stung on thick brown cord that slides to adjust to size.  Available in three designs: large central bead with the mantra Om Mani Padme Hung, 5 small orange dzi beads, 5 small brown and black dzi beads.  Made in Tibet.

This bracelet is made of small agate stones native to Tibet called “Dzi.” Dzi stones are unique because of their patterns that look like eyes.  The stone beads are strung on a thick brown cord that slides to adjust the size.  Available in two styles.  Made in Tibet.