Chapter 10- Delhi: Everything Changes and a New Life Begins
Tsering opened his foot locker where he stored his collection of robes and pulled out a green and grey denim jacket and a pair of blue jeans. Jennifer asked him why he had a set of lay clothes and he explained that he had used them during his escape from Tibet. He packed them in the one small duffle bag he owned along with his favorite Dharma and poetry books. He sent a message to his friend Thubten who studied at the Institute that he needed to see him as soon as possible that evening. Jennifer left to pack her own things while they both waited for the sound of Thubten’s motorcycle to pull into the monastery’s courtyard. Thubten came up to Tsering’s room and they shared their news with him. Thubten listened calmly and out of practical concern for his friend asked them questions about their next steps.
“Yes, I see. You two have strong karma,” he said and then asked, “Where will you go? Do you need clothes to wear?” Jennifer was impressed with Thubten’s lack of judgement and his genuine support of their decision. She was worried that Thubten might try to sway Tsering from leaving, try to convince him to stay. But Thubten had a true understanding of the Dharma and that this was not a choice at this juncture. Tsering’s heart had already made up its mind, he was in love and he had already returned his vows. There was no going back now. The only right thing to do was to help them move forward with the decision and support the two young lovers. Thubten called Kunga and asked him to come with a set of his clothes for Tsering and while they waited they discussed possible plans for the immediate future.
“I want Tsering to come to America with me,” Jennifer said. “He will need papers to apply for a visa. Do you know what the quickest way is to do this, Thubten?”
“I have heard that many Tibetans go first to Delhi to start this process. It is not easy. It is quite complicated. There are so many steps involved and a long waiting list. I have heard that many Tibetans buy passports in Nepal, too, to speed up the process. But there is risk involved if you choose this way. I have heard so many stories of Tibetans who have bought false identities and then get arrested at the airport. I would not suggest this route. I think it is better you go to Delhi and apply for refugee status with the Tibetan government first. You can then tell them your story and if you are lucky maybe they will issue Tsering a passport. It is in their hands. I wish I could give you more advice.”
“So that’s what we’ll do, then,” said Jennifer. “We’ll go to Delhi. Is it possible to purchase airplane tickets tonight for as soon as tomorrow?”
“Yes,” replied Thubten. “My friend is a travel agent here in the village. I will call him now and get your tickets.”
Kunga arrived with a white starched button-down shirt and a pair of pants for Tsering. Tsering thanked his friends and told them that they should not worry about him, his heart was pure and his faith in the Three Jewels had not faltered. He asked them to please distribute his robes amongst the monks the next day. Kunga and Thubten left Tsering and Jennifer, asking them to please wait before leaving in the morning, that they would like to say their goodbyes formally. Thubten also offered to arrange for a taxi to the airport in Varanasi for them.
Jennifer and Tsering sat down on the two beds and looked at each other in shocked silence. Their hearts were racing. The wheel had been set in motion. There was no going back now. In just one day so much had changed so fast. Love was declared, vows returned, truth was told and airplane tickets were being purchased. They both felt their entire lives shift, like a carpet had been pulled from under them. It felt raw and real and with no point of reference whatsoever. They both smiled and laughed with joy at the absurdity, freedom and courage that they were experiencing in that moment. Tsering took off his zen and shantab for the last time and dressed himself in the clothes Kunga had left him. Jennifer was sad to see him take off his noble robes– she had grown accustomed and attached to him in them. And although he looked uncomfortable and embarrassed in his new modern fashion, Jennifer let him know that he looked handsome. Tsering went to the door and told Jennifer that he would be back soon. She asked where he was going and he told her he needed to go see Genla Pema Gyatso, his teacher and Abbot of the monastery. It was not going to be an easy task– they both knew how Genla felt about their relationship. Jennifer asked if she could accompany him. She felt the need to say goodbye and stand together with Tsering in this.
The two quickly and quietly left through the monastery gates while the monks were occupied with evening prayers in the temple. Instead of walking down the village road, Tsering led Jennifer through the corn fields as the sun started to set past the horizon. It’s warm red glow was comforting to Jennifer– she felt connected to the Western Buddha Amitabha and received it as an auspicious sign and blessing. Eventually they reached the Institute, where Genla lived, and Tsering grew nervous. He almost didn’t have it in him to knock on his teacher’s door. He knew he was going to shame and disappoint him. Jennifer assured him that it was all going to work out fine, to stand strong. She was optimistic that Genla would listen to them and, if not approve, at least accept their goodbyes.
The door opened and Genla stood there looking confused. He did not recognize Tsering in his new dress– he needed to do a double take. “Who is this young man at his doorstep?” he wondered. But then he saw the unmistakable Jennifer beside him and it all came crashingly together to him.
Tsering humbly asked his teacher to please allow him to pay his respect and receive his teacher’s blessing, taking out a white katag and holding it out to his teacher in offering. Pema Gyatso did not accept the silk scarf but asked the two to come in and sit down.
He spoke in Tibetan directly to Tsering and it seemed to Jennifer that she was being purposefully ignored. Pema Gyatso started to lecture Tsering, explaining his disappointment in what he viewed as Tsering’s shameful decision. He asked Tsering if he had considered the consequences before making such a rash decision. Tsering awkwardly began playing with the gum he had been chewing. He could not bring himself to speak the truth to his teacher. He laughed nervously and was at a loss for words. Jennifer could not bear to see Tsering’s earlier confidence shot down and she tried to encourage Tsering to speak his mind.
“Go ahead, Tsering, tell him the truth,” Jennifer urged. She naively thought that the simple sharing of their truth– their love– would be enough to appease the Abbot.
“This is all my fault,” Pema Gyatso continued. “I should have seen the signs earlier and sent you away before anything happened. It is too late,” he said defeatedly. “Enough! Goodbye,” Pema Gyatso stood up and indicated the door to the young couple.
Tsering made one last effort to offer his katag as a sign of respect but the Abbot again refused. The two young people exited the door and looked at each other in disbelief. They walked silently back to the monastery through the dark fields of the village, emotionally exhausted and wondering what lay ahead. Too nervous to sleep, the two stayed awake through the night, working on the Green Tara tangkha that had yet to be completed, meditating, and praying.
After the early morning prayers were complete, the monks began to stop by to say goodbye to their Guru. Word had spread that he was leaving them. They had grown attached to him and were sad to see him go. For two years he had assumed the role of teacher, uncle, big brother and friend to them all. He was not fond of goodbyes and kept their parting short and sweet. The white taxi pulled into the courtyard and their bags were loaded into the cab. Each monk held out a white scarf to both Tsering and Jennifer, wishing them good luck on their journey ahead. Thubten and Kunga and their other Tibetan friends were there to say goodbye, too. Although sad to see them go, no one could hide their excitement for these two who were bravely embarking on an unexpected journey together. They all understood that the final destination for them was hopefully America. The potential for a happy ending to their story was irresistible from many of their perspectives.
The senior monks and friends joined Tsering and Jennifer in the taxi. They were all so excited for Tsering– he was about to take his first trip in an airplane. None of them, except for Jennifer, of course, had ever been in one before either. Everyone was full of optimism, reminding Tsering to not forget them when he left for his new life in America. They arrived at the small airport and Thubten handed Jennifer the tickets. They all said their final goodbyes as Jennifer led Tsering through the check-in process. Jennifer was so excited for him as she remembered the anticipation she had felt when she took her first airplane ride as a young girl. She realized that everything was going to feel fresh and new again with Tsering by her side. She was going to be able to relive so many experiences that she has grown to take for granted. By viewing the world through his pure eyes, Jennifer felt her Western cynicism start to melt away. It was like a return to childhood innocence, a return to presence in the moment.
They boarded the small plane and Jennifer made sure Tsering sat in the window seat so he could enjoy the view. She asked Tsering if he was nervous at all. He said he wasn’t but as soon as the plane lifted off, his body spoke otherwise. He grabbed Jennifer out of fear of falling as he looked in awe through the window at the earth that was gradually growing smaller as the plane flew higher. Tsering’s fear quickly turned into delight and a huge smile of relief beamed across his face. They were free. Together, in love, in the moment and with a life wide open to possibilities.
The plane ride was short, just under two hours. They touched down in Delhi and Jennifer led Tsering out through the crowded terminal to find a telephone. She didn’t have a plan about where to stay, but knew that Dr. Tashi’s family might have some suggestions for them. She had their phone number and rang. Mrs. Tashi answered the phone.
“Tashi Delegs, Mrs. Tashi,” Jennifer said, introducing herself. “This is Jennifer. I met you a few months ago with the Rinpoches. How are you?”
“I’m fine, thank you, Jennifer. Yes, of course I remember you! Where are you?” Mrs. Tashi asked.
“I’m here in Delhi, with a friend,” Jennifer replied. “We are here to take care of some business and we need a place to stay. Do you have any suggestions? We are looking for something affordable.”
“Oh, yes, I see. Please come to our home and we will help you in any way we can. You can stay with us, if you like, we have plenty of room for you both.” Mrs. Tashi kindly offered.
“Thank you so much. You are too kind. We really weren’t expecting you to open your home to us. But perhaps we could come and meet with you to ask your advice about our business here,” said Jennifer.
“Yes, please, come over directly and we will help you in anyway we can. Do you have our address?” Mrs. Tashi asked.
“I do. I have Dr. Tashi’s business card. We will be there soon. Thank you again, Mrs. Tashi. See you soon.” Jennifer hung up the phone and they left the terminal to find a taxi. Tsering had understood the gist of the phone conversation and he had an anxious feeling about meeting the Tibetan family.
“Jenni, Dr. Tashi’s home much difficult. Hotel good. No problem for Dr. Tashi’s family,” he tried to explain to Jennifer in his fledgling English. He was nervous about upsetting the Tashis and didn’t want to involve them in their troubles.
“Don’t worry, Tsering-la,” Jennifer replied. “The Tashis are such a kind family and we won’t stay there too long. We really need to get some help and advice. We’ll have a short visit and then find a hotel right away.”
When they arrived at the Tashis’ home they were greeted by the younger daughter, Sonam. The two young women were happy to see each other again. Jennifer introduced Tsering to Sonam who then led them upstairs to her family’s home on the second floor. It was a hot day in Delhi, mid-April temperatures had already started to reach 100 degrees fahrenheit.
“It is so hot now in Delhi. The summer season is upon us,” Sonam said. “Luckily we have a water cooler. Please, sit down and I’ll tell my mother you’re here.” Sonam left the two alone in the sitting room. Jennifer noticed that Tsering was nervous.
“Hello, Jennifer. So good to see you again. Welcome, welcome. Please, have some water to drink. It is so hot, you must stay hydrated,” the kind lady said as she served them both bottled water. “What brings you to Delhi in this heat?”
“Well, I am helping my friend Tsering to make papers. We were told that there is an Tibetan government office here that may be able to issue him a passport.”
Mrs. Tashi was surprised to hear this and immediately took over speaking in Tibetan directly with Tsering. Tsering explained that he was from Tibet and had not been in India very long, just over two years and that he had never taken the time to complete his refugee registration. All he had in the form of ID was a student ID card issued from the Tibetan Institute in Sarnath and the original paper work he was given in Dharamsala as a new arrival. Mrs. Tashi shook her head back and forth as she listened and sighed when Tsering finished. “You certainly have a lot of work ahead of you. It is not easy. Not impossible, but definitely not easy. Let me discuss with Mr. Tashi tonight when he gets done with work. We can have dinner together and you will spend the night here. I insist. Sonam, why don’t you show our friends their rooms and they can rest up a bit from the flight.”
Sonam showed them their rooms, two comfortable bedrooms with twin beds, just down the hall from each other. She showed them the water closet and told them to feel free to use the shower if they liked. She excused herself, explaining that her father was expecting her back at his office to help with the day’s work. Jennifer and Tsering were both exhausted from the travel, heat and excitement of the past 24 hours. Neither had slept the previous night and took the opportunity to lie down to catch up on much needed sleep.
A few hours later they were each awoken from deep slumber by Sonam, who was calling them to dinner. Tsering was introduced to Mr. Tashi and they all sat down to enjoy the family’s delicious meal. The phone rang and Mrs. Tashi excused herself to answer it.
“Miss Universe Pageant is on television tonight!” said Sonam excitedly. “Perhaps we can all have our dessert together in the sitting room while we watch. I’m rooting for Miss India. Aren’t Indian ladies just the most beautiful women in the world?”
“Oh how interesting,” replied Jennifer. “I never thought the rest of the world enjoyed watching pageants the way Americans do! Sure, that sounds like a fun way to pass the evening together. I wonder if Tsering knows what a pageant is,” Jennifer said looking across the table to Tsering. “Can you explain it to him, Sonam?”
Sonam looked embarassed and shrugging her shoulders answering, “Perhaps we’ll just let him figure it out as we watch!”
Mrs. Tashi reentered the room looking upset. She asked Dr. Tashi to please come and speak with her privately. The young adults all helped clear the table and then retired to the sitting room to watch the pageant. Soon after, Dr. Tashi came back to join them.
“Where is Mrs. Tashi? Does she not approve of pageants?” Jennifer inquired.
“Oh, it’s not the pageant that’s upset her,” Dr. Tashi answered. “It’s the phone call she just received. It was Khenpo Rinpoche.” Tsering and Jennifer immediately stopped watching the pageant and gave Mr. Tashi their full attention.
“You see, Khenpo Rinpoche heard that you both had left Sarnath together but did not know your whereabouts. Rinpoche was worried and thought to call here hoping that we may have news of you. Mrs. Tashi of course explained that you were both here at our home and then inquired about the nature of your relationship. When she heard that Tsering had been a monk at Rinpoche’s monastery and that your friendship was the cause of his leaving, Mrs. Tashi became upset. Don’t worry, she will calm down, just give her some time. Let’s enjoy the pageant!” said Dr. Tashi as he leaned back into his chair to relax for the evening.
Miss India ended up wearing the Miss Universe crown at the end of the show and she was the most elegant and eloquent pageant queen Jennifer had ever seen. “It’s true, Sonam, what you said about Indian women. They are special. Maybe they are blessed by the Goddess Vajra Sarasvati. They have a certain poise, grace, and elegance that is missed on the rest of us!” Jennifer offered.
Sonam agreed as she turned off the television and everyone got up to retire for the evening. Just as Jennifer and Tsering were leaving for their rooms, Mrs. Tashi returned and asked to speak with them. “I have decided to continue helping you both. I made some phone calls to friends to inquire about lodging and government office contacts. In the meantime I thought it would be nice for us to tour Delhi together tomorrow. I have arranged for a taxi to take us to the Lotus Temple, a local Tibetan Buddhist monastery and some other important sights. How does that sound?”
“You are so very kind, Mrs. Tashi. We have already been such an inconvenience to you. Maybe it is best we just leave in the morning. A friend suggested that we find cheap accomodations in Majnukatilla. Have you heard of this neighborhood? I believe it’s a Tibetan encampment,” Jennifer replied.
“Majnukatilla? Are you sure you want to stay there? It is so dirty. This place has a very bad reputation. Lots of bad people living there. And so many cockroaches. However, this may be the best place for you because there are many travel agents, businesses and contacts that may be able to help you make papers for Tsering. Let me talk with my friends tomorrow and get their advice. And please, allow me the pleasure of sharing a bit of Delhi with you. I am a housewife and don’t have the occassion to go out often. It will be fun for me, too!”
Jennifer was so impressed with Mrs. Tashi’s hospitality and genuine kindness. Although they felt sorry for causing Mrs. Tashi worry, they could not refuse her sincere offer. “That sounds so lovely. Thank you very much, Mrs. Tashi, for everything you are doing for us. We really appreciate it. We will excuse ourselves to bed, then. Good night. Zim jam nang go!”
The next day Mrs. Tashi took Jennifer and Tsering around Delhi in an air conditioned taxi as promised and they had a wonderful time together touring and taking pictures. Mrs. Tashi had spoken with her friends who all agreed that the best location for the young couple was a guest house in Majnukatilla where they would have easy access to travel agents and people with experience in making passports and visas. One of Mrs. Tashi’s friends had given her the name of one of the cleaner and more respectable guest houses. At the end of the busy day Jennifer and Tsering thanked the Tashis for their gracious hospitality and care and as a token of their appreciation, Jennifer bought a flower arrangement for the Tashis’ home. A taxi was hired to take the young couple to the Tibetan encampment in Majnukatilla where they would step out alone to begin their new life together.